Just asking [CAELAN]

This was not something he wanted to talk about, or deal with. It'd probably not get Caelan a damn thing. Not with how his life was going. His boyfriend didn't know who he was anymore. And his boyfriend had forgotten the things they'd done together. All of it stripped away because of some stupid noble. That idea ticked him off like no tomorrow. And he'd rather not dwell on those things. That was all really. He had his reasons, though he'd rather not talk about them. Why would he? It might not end up helping either by this point. But it wasn't like he knew. What could he get into that might not drag up memories for Devan. He did not want to let those things surface. Not at all. "Devan come on, do I really need to explain why I said that." He was not being mean, no he was actually laughing. Most of his emotions were laughter. Like he might just be teasing Devan. He was a bit of a butt that way. Caelan was not always relaxed, even more so now. But Devan had seen another side of him. Caelan couldn't entirely just make that go away. It'd make it obvious something wasn't right.

"No I don't. I just worry about you." He shrugged a bit and then looked back at the water. Maybe he could swim again. Since he did want to. Swimming sounded really nice for him. At least that was what he thought, who knew at this point. He might not be thinking clearly. Yet he couldn't help it. Caelan was sorting through his various emotions which were not good ones. Never had been really. Now that he was thinking about it. Just what was he going to say, perhaps he needed to do this some different way. Somehow. Without messing up. Or spilling the wrong words which he didn't need to do. Right? Devan would be better off not knowing any of that. And he'd rather just keep it directly at that. Don't let it go any further.

"I just...we both have a long way to go ya know? Before we are really ready to be like our parents." Caelan usually didn't admit that. His body wasn't strong, and he was just a child. He still had more room for improvement. More then he wanted, but it probably wouldn't do him any good either. At least for right now. "work, life, and all that sort of fun stuff...It's not great or anything. The headmaster should give us some time off, or at least me. I don't know, I don't want you going without me...That's all. Just ignore me I'm rambling." He was really rambling way too much right now. And it'd probably not end up helping him. Not at all, or ever. He'd probably just end up getting stuck in this situation.

He did not like lying to Devan. Not now so of course he'd manage to somehow say this without revealing everything he didn't need his ex getting upset. Or anything. More then he already was at the very least. That was all, yet right now he wasn't so certain why he was in this. Why hadn't he fled when Devan first lost those memories. Probably because he cared too much, and Devan needed his help. Or at least he thought the male did.

Caelan didn't like that idea of being told he didn't have to worry. Like that would even happen, he knew it already. Perhaps he needed to shrug this off and handle it some other way. Maybe. Either way he didn't even know what he might be getting into. This had confused him a lot by now. What could he do? Devan was so important to him. Right now he didn't know what to do, or what to say. He would let this go for now. "Devan...Are you sure? I guess it's just my nature. I don't want to lose you. But enough of that! We should go do something?" He said that in a sort of asking tone. As if he wasn't certain. He didn't want to hunt tonight or patrol. But it wasn't dark yet. So they could go out and have some fun. Something like that before things happened, or before he was forced into hunting. That never sounded bad to him before, just today he wanted to do something else.

Caelan had to deal with those vampires more then Devan. They might be okay now, but it could change at any moment. He knew that, and he'd rather not think about it. Since it wasn't bound to do him any good. Not at all right now, either way he'd just have to deal with it. Probably. He didn't like the idea of those things. Not now, and probably never. Either way this stuff happened. Caelan tried to shove his worries off and it only managed to upset him more now. Which he didn't want. So he took a moment to take a breathe and let all of this go. At least he felt alright now. Mostly. " I guess if you say so I'll try. Just for you." That was all he'd say and this was how he'd leave it. Though for now it probably wasn't important.

Devan always had that way to make him feel better. But he had to wonder what would happen with anyone? Like Nate, Devan and all those people. What if Caelan wasn't careful, what if he wasn't handling this properly like he should have anyway. Like he should have this time. Perhaps he needed to take a step back and think of things a little bit more instead. Before he made a mistake and tried to hurt someone. "I guess so. Maybe I'm just wondering about the future right now. Even if it's still awhile away." Well not entirely but it wasn't going to happen in the next year or two. They were exams to pass, tasks to do. And so on from there, by this point. He'd rather not dig back into all of that now.

"I guess so. But is that a good idea, I mean those people might not be very good. They might just try to cause problems instead. I'm just...I don't want anyone hurt Devan." He yawned while saying that. Caelan really was tired, a lot more then he thought. Sleep would be needed tonight or he'd end up blacking out at some point. That was all really, and he'd rather not get into that situation. It wasn't going to help him in any form. It'd just stress Devan out more then what was needed. And he knew it. So he just stayed there looking up at his best friend as if he was demanding attention. Maybe he was like a cat but he liked his hair being touched instead of fur. Since he didn't have fur.

Caelan had finally started to feel better, his body might still be sore but this didn't even matter to him. Why would it? After all everything he did was not so bad, and it'd probably never be. He'd just have to figure out how to handle it somehow. Maybe. At least Devan had stopped pushing these things. That was all. Pretty much. With a small sigh he tried to let his mind wander. He wondered what they'd be able to do. He almost wanted to get out of here but it seemed Devan had plans. Like making Caelan rest sort of plans. Even if he didn't want to. Which right now of course he didn't want to. That just hadn't been his style basically. But maybe he'd agree. Mostly because he was still a bit tired. Even if his friend might not like that he wanted to be stubborn. "What? Oh please, I know you wouldn't. but still. You are still hurt.That's why I'm worried this way. Don't think too much of it." He just shrugged a bit then went back to his own thing right now.

Which was trying to figure out if he wanted to sleep or not. Would Devan end up letting him? Perhaps not. He had always been such a stubborn butt. And he never let Caelan get away with things. Even if he wanted to. So it just never happened. With a small shrug he sat up then glanced towards Devan. He felt tired again, the idea of passing out sounded so nice right now. "Devan, If you want to go back to the dorm room. You should help me, at least help me walk back there. My body aches, and I feel really dizzy." He said as he just tried to get up again. He'd rather not end up in the water, or put too much weight on his boyfriend. Well ex. After all Devan still had his injuries to deal with. So hurting him worse was so far out of those cards right now.

"I guess so. Devan...do you think he'll give me a few days off at least? I could use one.." He'd admit that, but he'd rather not comment on the rest of this. Since it wasn't bound to do him much of any good either. Mostly. With a small laugh, he tried to keep happy about this. He was also a bit weird on this one. Not knowing exactly where he'd end up getting with this. Well as long as Devan led him back to his room he'd be alright. At least he could curl up next to Devan for now. Resting sounded so good to him as much as he wanted to be stubborn about all of that anyway.

"Well yea...I don't tell anyone but you." He rolled his eyes and just got up and tried to shake off the sleepy part he felt growing again.

Caelan wanted to just ignore all of this and pretend it wasn't happening. His body was a bit sore, mostly from lack of sleep. Go figure right. Why would he deal with this, or get into it. Right now he only wanted to go home. If he found his way home then everything would be alright. Or so he thought anyway. Devan would stay with him at least right. That might be all he could think of right now. "Come on dude let's just go, before I pass out and you have to drag me back. I don't need anymore bruises." He would hope they'd get out of here fast. It might be alright, at least he thought so. With a small smile he kept on moving. Wondering just where he'd end up going at this point. Maybe they'd get to just stay together like they used to. They would be going back to the dorm room. That was what Devan had told him, and he'd rather not change that. Or let it change at all. Perhaps. With that he glanced around so far things seemed to be alright. No one watching them. Devan wasn't hurt worse. He was still there.

At least it seemed like everything would be okay, and people wouldn't leave him. Hopefully. Yet he had a feeling none of that mattered. He tried to force his negative thoughts away. So far it had worked. Though not exactly as well as he wanted it to. Either way this might not end up going very well if he brought things up. So he'd keep that to himself. And hope it went somewhere good. Without messing him up or anything. Since he'd rather not step over some person's boundary or anything. Devan helped him out, it felt weird not being able to say he loved someone. When he really did have feelings for him. But that'd only get him in trouble if he tried to speak now. He already knew most of that anyway. Right now at the very least.

"Because work had to be done. So of course I didn't mention that, why would I? It's not gonna bother me or anything I guess." With a grin he only tried to cling onto Devan. Without hurting him. Caelan's steps were unsteady and he felt really exhausted right now. This might not have been his best idea at all. But things happened, and pretending they didn't only got so far. "If you say so. I just wonder how mad he'll be over this stuff. If I have to take a break and all ya know?" It wasn't like he did that often but Caelan felt like shit. His body was already half prepared to give out right about now. And he hated that idea in general at this point. Why wouldn't he? Seriously this was bad but good at the same time go figure.

"They aren't so bad though are they?" he had to ask, Caelan felt bad about him getting hurt. That was all. Really what was he going to do? Right now it might not end up doing him any good. At least for right now. Perhaps he needed to shrug this off, and tried to figure it out some other way. If that was even actually possible for once right now. Maybe. Though he'd rather not dig into that. He was just concerned, wondering what his ex was even about and how he was feeling at that. If he got hurt more he'd feel so horrible about it, and for now he just did not actually want to feel that way again. Not like he had the night this male had been bitten by that damn noble vampire.

"I guess so. Just tired now." He groaned and tried to ignore it. This probably wasn't going to end up helping right now. He already knew that much at the very least.

He did not entirely like relying on other people even Devan. But that boy was important to him. So if this kept him close then so be it. He would not end up going out of his way to complain about that. Or try to get him to stop or anything anyway. But Caelan would rest for now. When they got back to the dorm room. But he needed to change first didn't he? After all his body was a bit sore and worn out. And wet. Which he'd rather not deal with at this point. With a small sigh he moved away from his ex boyfriend. Just wondering what he was going to do right now. He just moved over to get into his locker and tug out his clothes. He didn't even care about stripping in front of Devan. He started to drop his clothes then dry off. Before at least putting his normal clothes back on. He was going to feel a little bit better. Though it might not end up doing much either.

Caelan just glanced back at Devan and winced a little bit. His stomach hurt but he would ignore that he couldn't let it get to him now. He'd probably only end up getting hurt. Or worse. Or something. Stress already took too much out of him, he'd rather not add onto that if he could manage to avoid it at all. Which so far right now it seemed to be a small possibility. At the very least. With a small shrug he wondered what to do. For now he just tucked those pictures away and closed the locker. Making sure his trunks were wrapped in the towel. He needed to wash them later, and let them dry when they got back to the dorm. At least that was what he thought. It probably didn't matter. "Come on dude let's go. I'm already tired, and you need to change now." He said with that tone of let's just go.

He really was seriously tired, and barely knew what to do about that. What was he going to say? How was he going to deal with this? It might only end up making bigger problems for him right now. Whether he enjoyed that idea or not. With a small groan he just rubbed his forehead. The headache was slowly starting to go away at least. That sounded good to him right now, and it made him feel a lot better. "Yea yea I know, and please I'm not putting that much pressure on you. You'll be just fine." He could have put more. Like the pressure Caelan had on his back before when Devan first got hurt. Carrying him back to the car like that had almost taken forever. Specially with the other things he had to hold as well.

"Yea Yea I know...just my body. I don't know...maybe I'm just really weird." He grumbled, and wondered what he was going to do. Right now he had a feeling it might not end up so well. Apparently. For the moment he barely knew where to go with this one either. He just glanced back at Devan. What would he do? This might not end up mattering very much either. "Come on let's go." That was all he wanted was to go back there to rest. The room would be good for him. At least for a little while anyway. Devan needed rest just as much as Caelan did, though a little bit less. Because Devan was sleeping where Caelan wasn't.

Right now he was only being stubborn, he didn't want to rely on Devan for everything. That'd just end up hurting him a lot more. Which was not something he'd actually like or want to deal with right now either. Perhaps he needed to shrug this off and deal with it in some other way instead. "Alright Devan, fine later. But you need to change. If you don't I'll make you." That was not an empty threat from him. It never entirely had been. Now that he was thinking about it. Perhaps he'd have more luck if he just took a next step. For once. He felt that he might not be in the right state of mind on this one. At least right now anyway. Perhaps he was alright. This couldn't be so bad, or at least so he hoped. Yet he didn't know where to go either. Caelan's thoughts were twisting all over the place apparently. He could only smile and hope this was alright. Maybe he needed to attempt to shrug this off. Somehow. Yet it might not end up helping either. What was he going to do?

For the moment he felt that he wasn't in the right spot or anything. He might just be messing up a lot more then he actually liked. That seemed to mostly be normal for him. At least right now. With a small step, he was back near Devan again. Waiting for him to move. So what if he didn't have his clothes that was not something he wanted to dwell on. He'd rather just ignore it somehow. For the moment anyway. Though it might not help. Caelan was still struggling through his thoughts. And he hated that idea in general. Just why the heck did it have to happen, what was he going to do. He might not be very useful but still. This was not something he wanted to think about. This was not just one of those random days. No Caelan had a bad day in general. Those pictures, all those memories brought back up. So he just wanted to sleep.

And maybe keep Devan in his bed. But he'd leave those comments to himself. At least for now. It probably wasn't going to change matters if he dwelled on it way too much. Devan had a lot going through his own head by now probably. Even if he wasn't aware of it. Exactly. This had become a bit too complicated for him. Those pictures were just memories, he didn't need anything else. He almost ignored the blush, after all Caelan was way too tired. His body wanted to give out. He wanted to just keep on sleeping. That was all. Though it might not end up doing him any good. Couldn't be so surprising on that one anyway. "Then come on let's go!" He laughed as he just walked a bit ahead of him. Though not leaving his friend.

He couldn't do that, it'd only end up causing more problems. All of them basically unwanted by this point.